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How Ya Gonna Keep 'em Down on the Farm after They've Seen Paree?

by Sam M. Lewis, Joe Young, and Walter Donaldson (1919)


    Reuben, Reuben, I've been thinking,
    Said his wifey dear;
    Now that all is peaceful and clam,
    The boys will soon be back on the farm;
    Mister Reuben, started winking,
    And slowly rubbed his chin;
    He pulled his chair up close to mother,
    And he asked her with a grin:

    How ya gonna keep 'em down on the farm,
    After they've seen Paree?
    How ya gonna keep 'em away from Broadway,
    Jazzin' aroun', and paintin' the town?
    How ya gonna keep 'em away from harm?
    That's a mystery.
    They'll never want to see a rake or plow,
    And who the deuce can "parley vous" a cow?
    How ya gonna keep 'em down on the farm,
    After they've seen Paree?

    Reuben, Reuben, you're mistaken,
    Said his wifey dear;
    Once a farmer, always a jay,
    And farmers always stick to the hay;
    Mother Reuben, I'm not fakin',
    Tho' you may think it strange;
    But wine and women play the mischief,
    With a boy who's loose with change:

    How ya gonna keep 'em down on the farm,
    After they've seen Paree?
    How ya gonna keep 'em away from Broadway,
    Jazzin' aroun', and paintin' the town?
    How ya gonna keep 'em away from harm?
    That's a mystery.
    Imagine Reuben when he meets his pa,
    He'll kiss his cheek and holler "oo-la-la!"
    How ya gonna keep 'em down on the farm,
    After they've seen Paree?





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