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Draft Dodger Rag

by Pete Seeger


    I'm just a typical American boy
    from a typical American town
    I believe in God and Senator Todd
    and keeping old Castro down
    And when it came my time to serve
    I knew better dead than red
    But when I got to my old draft board, buddy,
    this is what I said:
    Sarge, I'm only eighteen, I got a ruptured spleen
    And I always carry a purse
    I got eyes like a bat, my feet are flat,
    and my asthma's getting worse
    O think of my career, my sweetheart dear,
    and my poor old invalid aunt
    Besides, I ain't no fool, I'm a goin' to school,
    and I'm working in a defense plant
    I've got a dislocated disc and a racked up back
    I'm allergic to flowers and bugs
    And when bombshells hit, I get epileptic fits
    And I'm addicted to a thousand drugs
    I got the weakness woes, I can't touch my toes
    I can hardly touch my knees
    And if the enemy came close to me
    I'd probably start to sneeze
    I hate Chou En Lai, and I hope he dies,
    but one thing you gotta see
    That someone's gotta go over there
    but that someone isn't me!
    So I wish you well, Sarge, give 'em Hell!
    Yeah kill me a thousand or more
    And if you ever get a war without blood and gore
    Well I'll be the first to go ....





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